desire and longing

I ran many times to my mailbox yesterday, and many times to my emailbox, looked even so more many times to the sky, to the flying racingpigeons, doing their zero's and eights.

I expected a racing-dove coming down, knocking on my door, with a supposed letter like this in his beak. A golden letter with iwings written on it, and sealed with a real stamp from the heavenly royal mail...
But it didn't......

Would the racingpigeon have lost track?
forgot my address?
Stuck in a snowstorm?
or maybe fired?

I was kind of sad it did not come yet.
Maybe he comes tomorrow...Or the day after tomorrow..manyana

I miss the tangible real letters, with real stamps and handwritten addresses, of which you immediately knew where it came from.
I miss the smell of paper and ink, the arabicgum glue...
The envelopes, with AIRMAIL written or it, meaning coming from overseas.
I would dearly love even more to get a letter from heaven, with my name in calligraphic handwriting on it and a handwritten message inside, about what they wanted me to do and also why and when...
Not only to have blind faith...As if the feathers, the birds and bees are not telling me everyday.
I still would love to get a thing like this, really visible, tangible...
touchable..Convincing...